SECRETS in the African-American culture go way back. In the African American community, secrets were protection. The Underground Railroad was solely successful based on the slave's ability to keep a secret,...someone escaped, someone STOLE FOOD, from Massa's kitchen.......etc, etc. SECRETS were a necessary survival tool. The only problem is when African-American’s began keeping secrets about molestation, illness in the family, especially cancer and seizures. Our White brother’s and sister ’s became known as the only ones who "TOLD ALL THIER BIZZZZNESS", while the mantra of Africans Americans always warned “Don't put your business in the street". And so we didn't. BUT, we also didn't get the help that we needed. The African-American culture is grounded in secrets.
So, then one comes to a weight loss program, and finds that they do not even want to share their weight, which of course is ludicrous, right?! Shhhhhhhh......don't tell...be quiet......moreover, don't even tell anyone that I am trying to "lose" weight....Don’t let it out that I am in a "PROGRAM" to work on my "PROBLEM" It’s confidential. It’s “personal”. The mind says it's NOT a PROBLEM. “I just like good food and fellowship, but it's not a PROBLEM”!!! or one might say, "I'm just a busy person". Or, "I just don't "DO" FB, that's why I have no picture, where one belongs".
As the program progresses, one realizes that it is deeper. “Oh crap...I really can't stop...it is a PROBLEM”, just like the coach says.
This is why I always say this mantra: NO SECRETS. Really all people have masterd this skill that all too well. It is the OUTING that we are so uncomfortable with. Follow the GAY Movement, which is rooted in OUTING. Follow what White women are doing with their men. White men are being OUTED left and right. Conversley, Black women still pride themselves in their ability to keep secrets, but the secrets are killing them physically and spiritually. African American women and perhaps all women of color need to join the "MOVEMENT". Right now, White women are an excellent role model for how to get well emotionally. Molestation, Rape, Sexual-assaults, spousal abuse or abuse from significant others ia all being exposed.......but heck...African-American women don't even want you to know that they are overweigh, as if no one knows. Shhhh...the doc said I am diabetic, but please don’t share. It’s personal.
Ladies..ladies.....and I am addressing African American women first, because this is where the weight problem lies in epidemic proportions, It is a healing that I think only GOD ( via another African-American female can facilitate), such as Iyanla Vanzant, who is also overweight, by the way! Shhhhhhh...don’t tell that Michelle Edmonds wrote an article on Black women and the strenths of White women. Shhhh...I can’t believe she published that and told all our bizzzzzzzzzzzness. ! She didn’t have to go there! No worries, you can always call me and speak to me confidentially https://vcita.com/v/michelleedmonds. Much love to you my sistah’s.
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